


Clouded Mind

by Fandomsandbands



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Clace if you squint, I hate Clary and Jace so, Idk which name to call Jace, M/M, Malec, Multichapter, Saphael, m/m - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-04
Updated: 2016-08-02
Packaged: 2018-05-31 07:56:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6462160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fandomsandbands/pseuds/Fandomsandbands
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Valentine has forced a long standing prisoner of his to perform a spell that will convince Clary Fairchild that she is on his side. The Clave learns of the situation and asks the high warlock of Brooklyn to protect her mind. Instead, the spell rebounds and captures Magnus.</p><p>Saphael, Malec.</p><p>I update at least every Wednesday.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. One

"You requested to see me."  
The voice echoed against cold metal walls, making it sound a hundredfold more powerful than it was.  
"Don't waste my time, Valentine, it's a precious thing."  
A figure walked out from behind a iron pillar.  
"Hello, Adriel." The figure smiled wanly. It stepped further into the blinding, sterile light. Valentine's face was cut sharply in shadow, giving the illusion of a horrible disfigurement. He reached a hand for the other figure to shake.  
They made no movement. Valentine brought his hand back down, not breaking the unnerving smile.  
"Do you know why you're here?"  
The figure blinked. "No."  
Valentine snorted. He rolled his eyes.  
"All these tortuous years, and you still carry a pretense of arrogance." He took several quick steps and grabbed the man by the thick iron collar weighing heavy on his neck.  
"I can have you killed at this very moment, in ways you've never even dreamt of."  
The man shrugged nonchalantly.  
"I probably have dreamt them, actually."  
Valentine dropped the collar.  
"I have a task for you, warlock." He said.  
-•-  
Clary almost dropped the staff when Jace tossed it to her. It was much heavier than she was used to.  
"Uh, this isn't the staff I normally use..." She offered up the long rod hesitantly.  
"I'm aware. That one's metal." Jace picked a staff himself. "Does more damage." He took a stance. "You're getting better. You need a tougher weapon." Without warning, he struck out at her leg. Clary blocked without thinking. "See? Better." Jace took a quicker swipe at her shoulder. She sidestepped, then took a chance at his left rib. He blocked it with the staff and then tapped her right hip. "Open."  
Clary adjusted herself and went back in. "Like... This?" She gave a swift jab to his rib then a harder hit to his side.  
"Ow... Yeah."  
They stood up straight. Clary leaned the staff up against the wall. Jace set his on the table. She brushed a few strands of hair from her face, along with some beads of sweat.  
"Good match." She said breathily. Jace leaned on his knees.  
"Yeah." They stood there, allowing the uncomfortable silence to stagnate. Clary crossed her arms uncomfortably. What was she supposed to say, anywho?  
"Hi, Clary!" Clary blinked, startled. She knew that voice.  
"Simon?" The vampire jogged the few steps and stopped in front of Clary.  
"What are you doing here? It's nine thirty in the morning!" Simon shrugged nonchalantly.  
"It's pretty overcast, and besides, Isabelle texted me." Clary nodded.  
"Where is Isabelle? I haven't seen her all morning." Simon thrust a thumb over his shoulder, still grinning. "Over by the weird computer monitor thingies with Alec." Clary smiled happily.  
"Thanks, Simon. I've missed you!" She grabbed him by the forearms and hugged him tightly. "How's the Du Morte treating you?" Simon smiled.  
"It's great, Clary, Raph's been a help."  
Clary raised a ginger eyebrow.  
"Raph?"  
Simon shrugged. "He says he doesn't like it, but I call him by it anyway." He leaned in closer. "I think he actually likes it, secretly." Clary giggled.  
"You seem at home."  
"Yeah."  
Alec looked up at Clary and Simon when they came to the table. His brow furrowed.  
"Why is the vampire here?"  
Simon made a face. Clary opened her mouth to speak, but Isabelle interrupted.  
"I invited him. I think he might be of help on this case." Simon tossed a smug look in Alec's direction. Alec didn't look up from one of the several ancient tomes littering the glass table. Simon spun one of the giant books around. It was written in a language he couldn't recognise.  
"What are you doing, anyway?" He asked as he and Clary took a seat. Jace joined them a few minutes later.  
"A string of murders and violent crimes have been multiplying in the city's underworld. They all have one thing in common: two identical bitemarks on the neck." Simon looked startled.  
"On mundies?" He asked, leaning forward and biting his lip nervously. Isabelle nodded. A grim, heavy shroud descended around the table.  
"But here's where we're confused." Isabelle continued. "The victims weren't drained of blood. We can't even find an apparent cause of death. In all respects," She looked at Alec. "These people should be alive." Jace quirked an eyebrow. Simon breathed a sigh.  
"So not vampires."  
Isabelle shrugged. "That's my guess."  
Jace shook his head and looked up, jaw set in a firm line.  
"If it's not vampires, then what is it?"  
"Your guess is as good as mine."  
-•-  
Simon slipped in the back door to the Du Morte just past midnight. He hadn't intended to stay so late, really, but x had led to y and he found himself sneaking into the lobby at an ungodly hour of the night. Although, he supposed, that was what vampires did. He took a quick glance around and straightened, apparently satified.  
"Where were you?" An angry voice hissed. Simon swore and jumped about ten feet in the air. Not really. Can I actually do that? His subconscious wondered.  
"I-ah- the- Institute." He managed.  
Raphael stepped from the shadows, his brow furrowed in anger and concern. "Are you insane? They could've killed you!" He grabbed Simon by the shirt collar. "Are you alright?" He gave him a brief once-over.  
"M'fine, Raph, chill." Simon pushed Raphael back an inch. "It's not such a huge deal, no one hurt me."  
Raphael growled, but said nothing.  
"Why do you care, anyway?" Simon asked bitterly, straightening his jacket and brushing off his shoulders. Raphael looked away and crossed his arms.  
"I don't."  
Simon snorted. "Whatever. I'm getting a drink."


	2. Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So the only reason this is up this early is a friend of mine kept pestering me to write. Send her your love for the early chapter!

If there was one thing Alec hated, it was waking up. He had long since become accustomed to slipping out of bed at some ungodly hour of the morning, but that wasn't the problem.  
He hated waking up from the dreams.  
They weren't hard to remember, but they weren't easy either. They were pretty average, really- basic dreams of things he could never have.  
Like Jace.  
Like watching stupid movies with him. Like kissing him. Like being in love.  
But something had changed, recently.  
It wasn't Jace in the dreams anymore. Alec wasn't actually sure who it was. All he had figured from the snippets retained in his memory was dark hair, a stunning smile, and eyes.  
Eyes the color of sunflower petals.  
He stood up blearily. Normally, 7:30 would have been horrendously late for Alec to be just then getting out of bed. Today, he decided that he would allow himself some semblance of leisure.  
The second he stepped out into the hallway, Isabelle grabbed him by the arm.  
"Where have you been?" She hissed. "The Clave contacted us." She pulled him along, towards the center control room. "Magnus is here."  
When Alec stepped into the room, he could have sworn his heart rate went up. Magnus was sitting at a table next to Clary, poring over another old book. Isabelle knocked him in the base of the spine, gently, to remind him that walking was necessary to forward movement. Alec cleared his throat awkwardly and joined them at the table.  
"Good morning, Alexander." Magnus offered smoothly.  
"Yeah, um-hi." Alec tried. Clary turned up her lip incredulously.  
Isabelle took a seat. "Care to explain to Alec why you're here, Magnus?"  
Magnus seemed delighted.  
"The Clave has requested of me a favor." Magnus gestured to sit. Alec sat down quickly.  
"They have received word that Valentine is attempting a spell to capture young Clary Fairchild's mind." Magnus gestured towards Clary and himself. "They have paid me handsomely to protect her from it." Magnus' eyes fell back to the book, and he turned a page. Alec frowned.  
"How long will this take?"  
"At least today and tonight." Came Magnus' short reply. He didn't look up. Alec nodded. He opened a book himself, more to look busy than to get anything done.  
They went through books and scrolls and tablets until until Alec felt like his eyes could just pop out of his skull and roll away. Magnus had slowly compiled a list of things he was to require, as well as several enchantments for himself. The small group took a break near noon, for food and restroom and what have you. Magnus found Alec in the training room. He was attacking a large red punching bag, letting it swing a few feet after every barrage.  
"I would not want to be the man on the other side of your fists, Alec." Magnus commented. Alec turned around so fast the bag hit him in the back of the head.  
"Ow! Thanks... I guess." Alec replied.  
Magnus smiled. He sidled up to Alec slowly. "I'm going to be here awhile. Mind walking with me?" Alec's throat went dry. Magnus blinked.  
"Uh- sure."  
The hallways were quiet, save for a few voices from open office doors. Alec looked straight ahead. Should he look at Magnus? Was Magnus looking at him? He cleared his throat awkwardly.  
"So, did you want to talk about something, or-" Alec questioned. Magnus chuckled.  
"Has it ever dawned on you, perhaps, that I merely enjoy your company?" Alec flushed.  
"Well, no, I-"  
"It's alright."  
The two made their way back to the console room slowly, talking amicably about something or other. Clary looked up briefly when they came in. She said nothing. Magnus immediately took a seat next to her and flipped open a book. Alec stood quietly. "I'm going to find Isabelle." He announced, leaving the room. As soon as he stepped out, Magnus let out a deep sigh.  
"You really do like him, don't you." Muttered Clary.  
"Yeah."


	3. Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really early chapter.  
> Really, really early.  
> Enjoy!

"You have all you need." Valentine said maliciously. "So why are you taking so long?!?"  
Adriel glanced up at his captor. "I have finished the potion, but as I said, the restraints-" he shook them for effect. They made a loud clanging noise. A few of Valentine's men jogged in, seraph blades held aloft. Adriel did suppose that the chains sounded a bit like a break out.  
"Relax, gentlemen, no need for alarm." He called serenely. Valentine growled. It sounded like a rabid animal, low and broken. Adriel gave him a grim smile. Valentine sighed.  
"Remove his restraints. We need to perform the spell."  
-•-  
"How's it coming?" Jace asked. Magnus blinked, startled. "Well enough." He replied tiredly. Jace crossed his arms.  
"How much longer?"  
"Cut him some slack, Jace, he's working hard." Isabelle said, walking into the room with a plastic bag and a box. "Here." She directed at Magnus. "All you requested."  
Magnus glanced up from the spell book. "Yes, thank you. Tell me, where is Alexander?"  
No amount of anything would prepare Alec for this. Yes, he'd been on solo missions before. Yes, he'd been in tight spots before. No, he'd never had to face a steadily growing stream of demons with three arrows and a seraph blade. He took a stance, ready to defend himself. There would be no attacking. He'd be lucky to get out alive, let alone unscathed. He sent a silent prayer to whatever gods there are (or aren't, and he was wasting the thought) and went in, sword blazing. He hit downworlders wherever he swung the blade. The minutes passed by in limbo. He could feel his muscles aching. Spots danced across his vision. He stumbled, and something ripped through the flesh on his shoulder, tearing away the tshirt fabric. His eyes stung with tears he was too exhausted to force down. Just as the black came creeping to the forefront of his vision, he saw a flare of blue-white and voices. Then strong hands catching him, and the same sunflower eyes from his dream.  
-•-  
Magnus knew something was wrong the second he heard where Alec was. Isabelle and Jace had believed that it was only a few demons, but Magnus knew that there were at least two hundred downworlders waiting for the lone shadowhunter. After hearing this, Isabelle, Clary and Jace's faces contorted into horrified, terrible, shocked grimaces. Magnus had conjured a portal through the doorway, and they'd stepped through just in time to see Alec collapse,blood flowing freely from his wound. Magnus caught Alec, and watched frantically as his eyes slipped shut. He snapped his fingers and ran the blue sparks along the lengthy cut.  
"MAGNUS! C'mon!!" Clary yelled, cutting down a demon. Magnus picked up Alec and slipped through the portal, followed closely by Clary, then Jace, and finally Isabelle. He snapped the portal closed the second she stepped through. He focused both hands on the gash in Alec's shoulder. Clary traced the healing rune with her stele. Alec lay still a second more, then his eyelids fluttered and he groaned.  
"Don't sit up, Alexander." Magnus said sternly. "This is not a trivial injury." Alec turned his head slowly, stiffly.  
"Magnus..." He whispered fervently.  
"Not now, darling, tell me when I'm done." Magnus answered hastily, applying more sparks.  
"Why's it taking so long?" Clary asked, leaning forward worriedly.  
"A small amount of poison, but nothing I can't rectify." Magnus turned his attention back to the black-haired shadowhunter. "I'm going to put you back to sleep, okay?" Alec nodded sleepily.  
"Good."  
Magnus snapped his fingers, and everything went black.  
-•-  
Alec woke up sore. His limbs were stiff, his shoulder ached particularly bad, and he had the worst headache he'd had in a while. His throat was dry. Water, he tried to say, but all that came out was a croaking noise. Isabelle stepped in the room, carrying a bowl and a glass of water.  
"Good morning, Sleeping Beauty." She smiled, handing him the glass. He drank it gratefully.  
"How long was I out?" He asked, wincing at how rough his own voice sounded.  
"Just under two hours. Not long." Alec stretched, hearing bones crack into place. "That's.... Good." Isabelle looked down.  
"We're so sorry we let you go in there alone, Alec, Jace and I both." She started.  
"Hey, it's alright, you didn't know."  
"But, if Magnus wasn't here-"  
"But he was, Isabelle, and he saved my life." Alec sat up further, wincing. "Where is he?"  
"Thought you'd never ask." The lofty voice drifted lazily in from the doorway. Magnus stood leaning against the frame, eyes scanning Alec's form. Isabelle made a strange sound, cleared her throat, and walked out the door quickly, glancing back at Alec. He could've sworn she was smirking.  
"You seem to be feeling well." Magnus said, approaching Alec's bedside. He took a seat to the right of his knees.  
"Yeah, I feel much better." Alec responded. He suddenly felt very, very exposed, even if he was fully clothed. "I want to thank you." Alec coughed. "For saving my life, y'know." Magnus waved his hand nonchalantly.  
"Really, my pleasure. Just promise you'll be more careful in the future, Alexander." He laid a hand gently across Alec's thigh. Alec shivered involuntarily. "There are people who care about you very much." Magnus smiled, and stood. "Please alert any of us if you need help." Alec nodded dumbly, and Magnus turned and left.  
"What was that?" Alec murmured to himself, running his own fingers across the spot where Magnus had laid his hand.  
It burned like fire.  
The coldest fire Alec had ever felt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really early chapter. Really, really early.
> 
> Enjoy!


	4. Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for profanity

"Assar kalim saumnai..." The chants swam through the heavy air, weaving through the greenish, astral streaks of magic surrounding Adriel. He waved a hand over the book, another over the bubbling, viscous liquid contained in a large glass vial. It glowed a sickening purple. Valentine watched with a vulture's fascination, waiting with a hungry smile for the completion.  
After much pomp and circumstance, Adriel finally wiped his brow, waved his hand to disperse the magic, and pronounced himself finished.  
"And you're positive that this will work." Valentine said, holding the vial up to the light. Adriel nodded grimly.  
"However, I must warn you." Valentine looked up, startled. "If someone attempted to, or is able to, break the spell, it could possibly kill the person." Adriel felt cold, rune-inscribed metal close over his wrists and ankles, and his magic going back into dormancy. "Be absolutely certain that you want this." Valentine scoffed. "I no longer have use for you, warlock." He raised a hand to the two Shadowhunters guarding the doors.  
"Kill him."  
-•-  
Alec had finally worked up the energy to get out of bed, put on proper clothes, and walk to the console room. When he stepped in the room, Clary looked up. So did Isabelle, Jace, and Simon. Magnus didn't even seem to notice him arriving, as he was attending an old parchment, inscribed with a language that Alec didn't recognize. Simon gave a half-hearted wave. Alec didn't acknowledge him.  
"Wow, rude." Simon muttered distastefully. Clary elbowed his shoulder. "Ow!" Isabelle smiled helpfully at Alec. Jace tried to do the same, but it came out as more of a grimace. Alec nodded. A silence danced about the room on grim, heavy feet. It stayed that way for what seemed like hours.  
"Excuse me, but while your silent brooding teenage angst must be simply fascinating, I didn't come here to lounge around." Raphael. He walked into the room slowly, as if savoring his permeation of the lingering quiet. Simon smiled happily.  
"Hi." He intoned, then walked over to his fellow. Alec heard him whisper something along the lines of 'these people creep me the fuck out' into Raphael's neck. Raphael flushed scarlet. He pushed Simon away roughly.  
More silence.  
Finally, Jace spoke up. "Enough. Magnus, where are we with this?"  
Magnus jumped. "Naught more than ten minutes." He picked up the parchment and walked to the table. "This is the spell I must perform. It relies on Clary's runes, so make sure she has all of the basic ones." He rolled the paper and sighed. Alec noticed dark circles under his eyes. Or was that just makeup? Could warlocks even get bags under their eyes?  
"Clary, you're still missing three total runes." Jace announced. "We can draw them on now, if you're up for it." Clary nodded, and pursed her lips until they turned white.  
"Do it." Jace turned to Isabelle and Alec.  
"Get your stele. We'll all do it at once." The two nodded wordlessly and Alec went to retrieve his.  
Raphael took Simon by the arm.  
"I don't recommend being in the room when they begin. The pull for a fresh rune is something not even I can resist." Simon agreed. Did that mean Raphael had 'felt a pull' before? For whom? Simon felt a strange, hot emotion wash over him. He recognized it instantly.  
Jealousy.  
-•-  
Alec liked watching Magnus work magic. The way his deft fingers pulled, and pushed, and manipulated was something beautiful. Something to behold, indeed. He drew blue sparks and ribbons connecting every single one of Clary's runes, and suddenly Alec wished it was he being pursued by Valentine, just so he could be the one sitting on that table, feeling Magnus' magic tangle with his runes. He was startled out of his reverie when Raphael and Simon came back in, quietly. Raphael scoffed.  
"No, Magnus, oldest to newest." He pointed at the parchment. "I even wrote it down." Magnus hissed out a curse and dispersed the sparks. "Raphael has seen this cast before, that's why I asked him here." Magnus said to the room. "Clearly a good decision." The sparks fled from his fingers like animals from a wildfire. Clary grimaced.  
"Please be careful. The new ones-oww- still hurt." Simon ran his tongue across his fangs. Raphael looked at him with- was that possessiveness?- and flicked his hand. Simon started out of the stupor and turned pink. Magnus connected the last rune and leaned back, sighing. Alec thought of catching him.  
"Now what?" Isabelle asked.  
"Now we wait."  
-•-  
It came at about eleven. Clary was just sitting on the table, when suddenly she doubled over in pain. Magnus snapped up like he'd been slapped. He instantly put more sparks into the network surrounding Clary. Isabelle jumped up. "I'll go find Jace!" She dashed away. Magnus was making a visible effort now, his eyebrows scrunched, a sheen of sweat forming.  
"It's- strong.." He said in an exhaled puff of air. "Incredibly s-so." Alec reached out to support him. "No!" Magnus yelled with surprising intensity. "It'll just hit you, Alec!"  
Jace and Isabelle came through the doorway, followed closely by Raphael and Simon.  
"What's going on?" Simon asked, frightened. Clary groaned. Magnus hissed again. Alec felt useless.  
"The spell's attempting to take affect!" Raphael said loudly enough for the room to hear. "This all depends on how strong Magnus truly is!" Alec's brow furrowed. He clenched his fists uselessly. "Dammit." He whispered.  
The lattice of cerulean flickered, and something began creeping up the magic.  
Black tendrils slid along Magnus' magic, targeting the runes. The links began to crumble, falling into nothing. "No!" Magnus poured more sparks in. The tendrils, instead of being drowned, began to climb Magnus' magic. They reached his hands, then climbed to his hands. The magic on Clary fell away entirely.  
"What's happening?" She asked, in a panic. Magnus fell to one knee. The onyx veins had reached his cheeks.  
"Please- Alexander.... Run." He whispered, right before the black reached his eyes.  
-•-  
Magnus stood upright. Bolt upright. Alec stood up cautiously. One second the room's spinning like a top, the next everything's entirely normal. (Save for the papers on the floor)  
"Magnus... What was that?" Alec asked in a shellshocked monotone. Magnus didn't seem to have heard him.  
"Magnus!"  
The warlock looked over to Alec. The muscles in his jaw tightened. Isabelle yelled "Get down, Alec!" And Jace tackled him to the floor as soon as a blue shot of energy from Magnus' fingertips burned a hole in the wall behind him. Simon cursed loudly. Magnus snapped his head towards him. "Downworlder." He hissed through clenched teeth. Simon growled and bared his fangs. He ran at the warlock in a blind rage. Magnus dodged to the side, shocked for just a moment, until his magic went directly through Simon's ribs.  
Simon collapsed like a bag of rocks.


	5. Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another warning for profanity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here, have an early chapter.

"SIMON!" Clary got there first. She hovered over him frantically.  
"Fuck, what the hell do I do, I don't know!" She sputtered. It sounded like a scratched record. Isabelle pried her off of him. She seemed to be only barely more composed than Clary. She started to sob into Isabelle's shoulder.  
If Raphael was devastated, or frightened, or even the slightest bit confused, he didn't show it. His face was stony and reasonable as he knelt beside Simon. He brushed a stray piece of hair from his face.  
"Is he-I mean-" Clary hiccuped. "Will he be okay?" Raphael blinked and looked in her direction. When he spoke, it was a complete contradiction to his appearance. He sounded defeated, and lost, and incredibly furious.  
"I don't- I don't know."  
The hallway was desolate. Jace traced his hand over a hole in the wall, his eyes drifting across the numerous others. Several people, all clad in black, ran back and forth between prone bodies, treating who they could. He took a careful step forward, avoiding fallen debris. Something fell with a resounding crack in the distance. Jace was sure of one thing, then.  
Magnus Bane needed to end.  
The first person to come back to their wits was Isabel. She looked to Raphael, a sense of urgency overpowering the shock.  
"What should we do?" Clary sniffed and wiped her eyes. "Y-yeah?"  
Raphael's hands ghosted over Simon's eyes, his wound, everything. He pulled up his shirt, inspecting the area. The skin was angry, but not broken. Raphael frowned.  
"That makes no sense!" Clary uttered. "That just looks like a bruise!" Simon's head lolled to the side. Raphael caught it.  
"That's because this was magic, not physical injury."  
"Then why'd it make holes in the wall?"  
Raphael swallowed hard. "The spell eats at a creature's conscious, then destroys its mortal form. Walls have no minds of their own." He slid his arms under Simon's knees and shoulder blades. He took up his burden and stepped towards the door.  
"Wait!-" Clary called, but Raphael was already gone.  
Isabel found Alec in his bedroom. He sat, shoulders hunched, on the edge of the bed. His hands were clasped. Isabel could see them shaking.  
"Hey..." She started. Alec looked up at her, but said nothing. "You okay?" She asked, sitting next to him. The bed dipped under her weight.  
"He tried to kill me." The sentence was barely above a whisper, and constructed entirely of pain and disbelief. "Isabel... He tried to kill me."  
"That wasn't Magnus, Alec."  
Alec heaved a sigh. "I know that, Izzy, so why" he gestured to his chest. "Does it hurt so much?" Isabel swallowed.  
"You already know why."  
Alec looked down, and away. "Because I love him."  
-•-  
Magnus Bane, over his many years, never once believed that he would ally with Valentine, of anyone. And yet, here he was. Sending a message to a man who wanted him dead. With a wave of his hand, and a few sparks, it was done. He sank into one of his many armchairs, thumb and index to his temples. The vampire boy, he hadn't regretted that one minuscule bit, so why?  
Why was the horrified face of the Lightwood boy sitting just behind his eyelids?  
He groaned, and sank further in the chair. Dammit. He turned his attention out the window. The sun always sank beautifully behind the Brooklyn skyline. But now, it looked more like spilt blood, running down the skyscrapers.  
That night, he dreamt of a boy. A boy with beautiful eyes the color of the sky, hair as dark as sin, and skin of ivory. In the dreams, he was in love with the boy, and the boy was in love with him and it all felt so right, and everything was perfect.  
Magnus woke in a cold sweat. One thought wrapped around his mind, crushing all else.  
"I'm in love with Alexander Lightwood." He said to himself.  
-•-  
Raphael Santiago laid Simon Lewis in a dark brown coffin lined with red silk. The body, appearing even more lifeless than usual, gave no response. Raphael gritted his teeth.  
"Dammit, Simon." He hissed painfully. "You're such an idiot!" He slammed a fist on the coffin. Nothing happened. "Curse you.." He whispered again. Raphael leaned down, and with a gentle touch, kissed Simon on the forehead. A single tear landed on Simon's cheek.  
"Curse you for making me love you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, Saphael kisses!


	6. 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another warning for profanity and brief talk about sexual events

Whatever Valentine had expected to receive after the spell was cast, it was most certainly not this. Clary walking through the door, maybe, the heads of those vile Lightwood children, hopefully, but a message from Magnus Bane? That was nowhere near his ideals. He cursed.   
"What did you do?" Cracked, broken, the voice rose from a bloodied body barely leaning against the wall. "That's not Clary Fairchild." Adriel barely looked humanoid. One eye was swollen shut, and three teeth were missing. He still gave a defiant glare from the one eye that could open. Valentine sighed irritably. "Remind me why you're not dead yet?"  
"Because, like it or not, you need me. You need me to clean up your little mess."  
"I DO NOT NEED YOU FOR ANYTHING!" Valentine roared, standing and -in the process- throwing his chair down onto the concrete. One of the legs splintered and fell off. Adriel rolled his eye and said nothing. Valentine studied the prone figure for a moment.  
"I will relish watching you die."  
"As will I."  
-•-  
Alec had always had nightmares. That was part of being a Shadowhunter, he told himself. It came with the job, with the monsters and all sorts of creatures. And he'd done what he could about it, but if it existed, Alec had already tried it.  
Twice.   
The normal nightmares were bloody, yes, gruesome, absolutely, but he'd learned to sleep through those. It had been at least two years since he last woke up from one.  
But that night, it seemed like all he did was wake up, then fall asleep only to wake up screaming yet again.   
It was always the same dream. Or, at least, the same elements. Sometimes different people died. Sometimes he died. Always, death.   
It continued until his alarm rang at 5:30. There was no point to it, he was already awake. Alec threw on a shirt, glanced towards the unmade bed, then left. His bare feet hit the smooth floor, over and over, like the beat of a marching drum. He sniffed. It smelled like new wood. The place had been fixed incredibly fast, and incredibly noisily. It hadn't helped with sleep, certainly. Rubbing sleep from his eyes, Alec noticed. Too quiet. He knew Isabel wasn't awake yet, and Clary definitely not. That left Jace, who would probably be training. Even in the middle of a crisis, he would be up at the asscrack of dawn, punching that stupid bag of sand. Alec took the long way to the combat room, purposefully wasting time. He wandered in just as the punching bag swung still.   
"Hey." Alec said blearily.   
Jace wiped a towel across his face. "Morning." He looked over at Alec, then blinked. "You look awful." Jace took the few paces towards him, and frowned deeply. "Alec?"  
"Yeah?"  
"Have you been sleeping okay?"  
Alec rubbed his temples. "I- yeah."   
"... Okay." Jace picked up a black wood staff, and weighed it in his hand. He took another and tossed it to Alec. He barely caught it. "Care to see if I can still kick your ass?"  
"Maybe another day, Jace."   
The blonde looked worried for a millisecond, but then he said, almost hesitantly,   
"So you're scared I'll beat you, then!"  
"Not really."  
"Then prove it!"  
"I don't want to, Jace, now stop asking." Alec walked away quickly, towards the control room. Jace studied his retreating back for a moment, then turned back to the bag.   
-•-   
Raphael had stood vigil over Simon the entire night. He'd brush that one insistent piece of hair out of his eye, only to have it return to its place within minutes.  
Raphael had never really been in love before. He'd had the sex, gentle and rough, for longer than he'd care to admit. He'd had the kisses, and the declarations of love, but he'd never felt anything like this. He'd wanted men and women alike, many times over, and he wanted that from Simon, too, but with him, it was different.   
He didn't just want to take him, he wanted to hold him, and love him, and never let him go. And thinking- knowing- that Simon could die without knowing that, was killing him all over again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sorry


	7. Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, I'm back! Guess who's not dead yet?

Valentine massaged his temple and groaned. Of all the people the spell could have affected, it had to be Magnus fucking Bane. He had stooped low enough with Adriel, but Bane was a whole new level of revolting. But still, there was a little voice that swam around in the back of his mind, hissing the truth over and over again.  
You can use him.  
He stood up abruptly. However much he hated it, Magnus Bane was one of his most powerful chess pieces on the board.  
"Bring me the warlock." He snarled at one of his guards.  
"No need to be gentle."

-•-

"No! P-please, Magnus, I-" Alec shot up from the bed, sweating and panting like a dog. He looked around wildly before realizing that he was in his bedroom, sheets dampened by sweat and tangled about him.   
He sighed heavily and fell back. There were too many reasons for his dreams, too many excuses, but in the end, it all boiled down to one, solitary, conclusion.  
"You love him."  
Alec whipped his head around to look at the doorway. Clary was leaning on the frame, looking just as tired as Alec felt.   
"You love him. I can see it."  
Alec massaged his temple.  
"How can you tell?" He asked blearily.  
"It's in your eyes, the way you look at him." Clary brushed a strand of fiery red hair out of her face. "I can tell because it's the way I look at Jace."

-•- 

Magnus Bane always answered the door with a flourish, making sure to get in the first 'hello' or 'good day' before the ringer. And, as shitty as he felt (for whatever reason) he still made that same attempt when he answered the door that morning.  
"Hello?" He asked gracefully.  
"Magnus Bane? Valentine has need for you."  
Magnus smiled, though his stomach dropped to his feet.  
"Then let me get my coat." 

-•- 

Raphael hadn't slept. He was almost positive that even if he tried, nothing would come. The pale (growing paler by the hour) face of his Simon would merely haunt him, and he had enough demons.  
"Raphael, sir? You've been there for a long time. Perhaps you should come away, have something to-"

"I'm not fucking moving. Get the hell out of here." Raphael hissed at the perpetrator, throwing all of his spite and misery and anger into those words. They didn't make it any better, but at least he could attempt to blame someone other than himself.   
'Oh, but we all know exactly whose fault that is.'  
Raphael groaned and buried his head in his hands. It was his fault. His fault. His, and his alone. Simon was dying (again) because Raphael had been incompetent. Useless, if he went so far.   
"I killed Simon Lewis." He whispered, in horrified realization.

-•-

Magnus had been sitting in that goddamn car for nearly an hour. The tinted windows were made to keep him obscured from the outside, but they also consequentially obscured the outside from him. The bloody driver wouldn't say a thing about where they were, and the escort was just as talkative. Magnus had taken to playing with his rings when the vehicle pulled to a stop. The escort pulled the door open, and Magnus stepped out.  
"Hello, Magnus Bane." Valentine called.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know how incredibly late this is, and I'm sorry. My phone broke and then I got caught up in summer. So again, sorry and thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I update every other Wednesdays, at the least. Probably earlier.
> 
> EDIT: I am now updating at every Wednesday! As I've said before, probably earlier.  
> Happy reading!


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